3 days ago
Matrimonial Matchmaking Raises Questions About Screening and Safety
People use matrimonial websites to look for someone to marry.
Some users in this article said they found misleading information or had upsetting experiences.
One woman said a man’s profile said he had never been married, but another woman told her they were still legally married.
Another user said a man accused her of taking money after she chose not to continue seeing him.
An expert said the long search for a partner can make people tired and less likely to notice warning signs.
The article also explains that a disappointing match is not always a scam.
Some platforms say they check profiles with technology and people, and investigate reports.
They advise users to be cautious because confirming someone’s identity does not prove everything they say is true.
Aradhana Sharma said a premium matchmaking service did not provide the personalized screening she expected.
Ritika Mahtani said a man’s profile described him as never married, though another woman told her they were still legally married.
Mahtani also said a different man falsely accused her of taking ₹30,000 after she ended their connection.
Psychologist Tanishkka Yadavh warned that relationship fatigue and pressure to marry can make people more vulnerable to overlooking inconsistencies.
BharatMatrimony and Vows for Eternity described verification and reporting measures, while acknowledging different approaches to identity checks.
- Who
- Matrimonial platform users, including Aradhana Sharma and Ritika Mahtani; experts and platform representatives.
- What
- Users described concerns about profile screening, misleading marital-status claims, unwanted contact and a disputed money accusation; platforms outlined their verification and reporting processes.
- Where
- India; the platforms and encounters are discussed in the context of online matrimonial matchmaking.
- When
- Mahtani’s experiences described in the article took place in 2019 and soon afterwards; the article does not give a publication date.
- Why
- The article examines the risks users face when profile claims and platform verification do not match their expectations, alongside pressure and fatigue associated with finding a spouse.
User concerns
Platform responses
Premium screening and verification
User concerns
Sharma said the paid service felt more like a call-centre operation than personalized matchmaking, and questioned whether profiles were adequately screened.
Platform responses
Vows for Eternity and BharatMatrimony described human onboarding, due diligence, technological checks and manual review as parts of their verification processes.
Technology versus human checks
User concerns
The article notes that identity checks alone cannot confirm the truth of all profile claims, such as marital status or intentions.
Platform responses
BharatMatrimony says it uses AI image screening and other checks alongside manual reviews; Vows for Eternity’s founder said conversations and human due diligence matter more than photographs alone.
What counts as a scam
User concerns
Users described experiences they considered deceptive or distressing, including a disputed marital-status claim and an allegation of money being taken.
Platform responses
Yadavh cautioned that incompatibility, a change of mind or taking time to decide about marriage is not automatically fraud; she said dishonesty and deliberate exploitation should be distinguished from disappointing experiences.
Key facts
- Mahtani’s first experience
- She said she learned nearly two months into knowing a man that another woman claimed to be his wife and said they were not legally divorced.
- Profile status
- Mahtani said the man’s matrimonial profile listed him as “single/never married.”
- Money accusation
- Mahtani said a different man accused her of taking ₹30,000 in cash; she said the accusation was false.
- BharatMatrimony checks
- The company describes mobile OTP verification, AI-based checks, optional selfie verification and manual review of profiles needing closer scrutiny.
- Reported profiles
- BharatMatrimony says reports can trigger review, investigation or restrictions, and that action is typically taken within a few hours.
- Vows for Eternity
- Its founder said the service speaks with people during onboarding and conducts due diligence; she reported no fraudulent-identity or financial-fraud cases through the service.
- Identity verification caveat
- Psychologist Tanishkka Yadavh said verifying a person’s identity does not establish that every claim they make is true.
Quotes
Tanishkka Yadavh
Psychologist discussing risks and distinctions in matrimonial matchmaking.
“A person who changes their mind is not necessarily a scammer. Two people discovering that they are incompatible is not fraud. Someone taking time to decide whether they want to marry is not, by itself, deception.”
indianexpress.com
“What I hoped would be a way to meet someone I could build a life with became a deeply distressing experience.”
indianexpress.com
Sources
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