1 day ago
‘Ma’ Highlights Why Healthy Marriages Need Personal Space
Being married does not mean two people must do everything together.
Athul Raj says it can be healthy for each person to keep their own friends, interests and routines.
Time alone can help someone feel settled and remember who they are.
It can also give partners new experiences to share with each other.
A person may need quiet after a tiring day, and that does not automatically mean anything is wrong.
Taking a short break during an argument can also stop people from saying hurtful things.
But if someone keeps using space to avoid talking about a problem, the problem may remain unresolved.
A healthy break includes being willing to return to the conversation.
Counselling psychologist Athul Raj says personal space helps spouses preserve their individuality.
Maintaining friendships, interests and routines can support a sense of identity outside marriage.
Time apart can offer mental space and bring new experiences into the relationship.
Needing silence or a break after a hard day or during an argument does not automatically signal a relationship problem.
Space may become withdrawal when it repeatedly postpones difficult conversations and unresolved issues are never addressed.
- Who
- Married partners; counselling psychologist Athul Raj offers guidance.
- What
- The article discusses personal space in marriage and how to distinguish it from emotional withdrawal.
- Where
- When
- Why
- Personal space can help partners maintain individuality and avoid making one person responsible for all companionship and emotional support.
Healthy personal space
Emotional withdrawal
Taking time apart
Healthy personal space
A person may need quiet or a pause during a heated argument; this can help them settle and avoid hurtful exchanges.
Emotional withdrawal
Distance may function as avoidance if it is repeatedly used to escape conflict, accountability or emotional vulnerability.
Returning to the conversation
Healthy personal space
A healthy request for space includes some indication that the person intends to return and address the issue.
Emotional withdrawal
Repeated postponements can leave a partner waiting while the same unresolved issue continues to return.
Key facts
- Expert quoted
- Counselling psychologist Athul Raj
- Personal space can include
- Separate friendships, interests and routines
- Potential benefit
- Maintaining a sense of identity outside the relationship
- Taking a break
- Can help someone settle after a difficult day or prevent an argument from becoming more hurtful
- Sign of possible withdrawal
- Repeatedly postponing conversations or avoiding accountability and emotional vulnerability
- Key distinction
- Whether the person returns to the conversation and is willing to address what happened
Quotes
Athul Raj
Counselling psychologist who comments on personal space in marriage.
“If conversations are constantly postponed, one partner is left waiting, or the same unresolved issue keeps coming back, then the space may actually be functioning as withdrawal. At the same time, taking a break during an argument is not necessarily unhealthy. When emotions are very high, stepping away can prevent the conversation from becoming more hurtful. The important part is whether the person eventually comes back and is willing to deal with what happened. If they keep using distance to`],”
indianexpress.com
“Personal space is important in a marriage because being close to someone does not mean giving up your individuality. When partners maintain their own friendships, interests and routines, they continue to have a sense of who they are outside the relationship. This becomes particularly important over time, when work, children, finances and family responsibilities can make the marriage the centre of almost everything.”
indianexpress.com
Sources
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